有压力的生活，附带的好就是给生活踏实的重量，而所有不好都在我的阴阳怪气，我脱口而出的重话，一定伤到你了。
真抱歉
10月 8th, 2008 by eleph这个十一可说了很多话亚
10月 4th, 2008 by eleph今天气温突然又降下来，穿薄外套凉凉的，小闲说：这像龙山的天气，我喜欢龙山的天气。我们坐在319路二层的时候，看云层低低地压下来，压到远处高高的烟囱旁边，又厚又软的质感，像小时候盖的踏花被，也像望不到边的棉花糖。也不全像，看起来比它们都要阴险一点，有情绪，还隐隐勾勒出手的形状。
时间过得可真快，所以老说昨天昨天怎么样，算一算却是前天或者更前面时间里的事情。恩，昨天她刚刚到北京呢。她今天走啦。
不高兴
09月 26th, 2008 by eleph据说在印度，“性的表现规范”不仅基于“良善社会风俗”的理由，还牵涉到人口问题。目前最让这个国家头痛的就是如何抑制人口增加。
像这样，在印度做一个荡妇，平白无辜就会多一条被人唾弃的理由，看起来也没什么特别的不对，可是如果心情不好，就会忍不住问：这是不是也算一种不公平。
i wish i could have a river
09月 24th, 2008 by eleph北京突然降温，站在被人气充斥的温暖的车厢里边，望窗外的萧瑟的街景，都仿佛觉得是冬天一样。
《river》也很好听的，唱到”I wish I could have a river”感情酝酿充裕，到”I made my baby say goodbye”的时候刚好可以在内心世界里面小小的爆发一下,红一秒眼眶,继续投入下一段.
将近一个小时的公车,除了和小狗断断续续的对话,我想起了好多事情.
初中提前升高中,备考的时候,爸爸生了一场大病,胆结石,第一次去医院,看见爸爸虚弱地躺在病床上,嘴唇干裂,我吓了半死,在这个倒下的巨人面前.敷衍地坐了一会就逃回家去,后来很几次,妈妈叫我跟她一起去医院,都以课业太多为由而拒绝掉,很长一段时间妈妈一直在埋怨这个没有爱的孩子.我的内疚和自责,在看见那个桃核大小的结石的时候,在爸爸床头柜一个透明袋子里,哭了很久,然后才悄悄流失掉.而流失不掉的是，我总是在想，我一次一次，该是叫你们多么失望亚。
还有很多,写下来过或者没写过,我站着,突然就没了力气,我一直摇摇摆摆地小心地取舍地活着,我以为我这么小心翼翼,选了又选,肯定不会错,可偶尔忍不住回头看看,还是丢掉那么许多不想丢掉的东西,而且是永远都捡拾不回来了.
要见缝插针地玩
09月 20th, 2008 by elephUrge for Going
I awoke today and found
the frost perched on the town
It hovered in a frozen sky
then it gobbled summer down
When the sun turns traitor cold
the frost perched on the town
It hovered in a frozen sky
then it gobbled summer down
When the sun turns traitor cold
and all the trees are shivering in a naked rowI get the urge for going
But I never seem to go
I get the urge for going
When the meadow grass is turning brown
Summertime is falling down and winter is closing in
But I never seem to go
I get the urge for going
When the meadow grass is turning brown
Summertime is falling down and winter is closing in
I had me a man in summertime
He had summer-colored skin
And not another girl in town
My darling’s heart could win
But when the leaves fell on the ground
Bully winds came around
Pushed them face down in the snow
He had summer-colored skin
And not another girl in town
My darling’s heart could win
But when the leaves fell on the ground
Bully winds came around
Pushed them face down in the snow
He got the urge for going
And I had to let him go
He got the urge for going
When the meadow grass was turning brown
Summertime was falling down and winter was closing inNow the warriors of winter
They gave a cold triumphant shout
And all that stays is dying
And all that lives is gettin’ out
See the geese in chevron flight
Flapping and racing on before the snow
And I had to let him go
He got the urge for going
When the meadow grass was turning brown
Summertime was falling down and winter was closing inNow the warriors of winter
They gave a cold triumphant shout
And all that stays is dying
And all that lives is gettin’ out
See the geese in chevron flight
Flapping and racing on before the snow
They got the urge for going
And they got the wings so they can go
They get the urge for going
When the meadow grass is turning brown
Summertime is falling down and winter is closing in
And they got the wings so they can go
They get the urge for going
When the meadow grass is turning brown
Summertime is falling down and winter is closing in
I’ll ply the fire with kindling now
I’ll pull the blankets up to my chin
I’ll lock the vagrant winter out and
I’ll fold my wandering in
I’d like to call back summertime
Have her stay for just another month or so
I’ll pull the blankets up to my chin
I’ll lock the vagrant winter out and
I’ll fold my wandering in
I’d like to call back summertime
Have her stay for just another month or so
But she’s got the urge for going
So I guess she’ll have to go
She gets the urge for going
When the meadow grass is turning brown
All her empire’s falling down
And winter’s closing in.
And I get the urge for going
When the meadow grass is turning brown
And summertime is falling down
So I guess she’ll have to go
She gets the urge for going
When the meadow grass is turning brown
All her empire’s falling down
And winter’s closing in.
And I get the urge for going
When the meadow grass is turning brown
And summertime is falling down
最近想贴的歌，都找不到链接。这一首是我在迷笛淘到的Joni mitchell 精选专辑里面最喜欢的一首，胜过传说中最悲伤的圣诞歌《RIVER》，也胜过《chinese cafe》。歌词只听得懂一点点，就觉得很喜欢了。
另外的事，也不知道是不是很好笑，即便平常的日子都不在一起，可是知道你将行远方，我的思念早在你收拾好行装之前就鸣笛出发，我不知它去向何方，恐怕至少也要挑个好山好水的地方，毕竟它一直都随我在这平凡的日子沉寂着，终于也出发了。
随机
09月 18th, 2008 by eleph
这一张叫《one and one is one》。
在MP3里面放了一个暑假，公车和地铁太吵，来来回回都没认真听完过。今天在超市结账，随机播放到最后一首，《pliot》。然后我就问自己，那么好听而且熟悉，是不是在哪里听过。还有，哪里来那么闷骚的乐队，偏要把最好听的放在最后。
桃花依旧笑春风
09月 15th, 2008 by eleph一个人回来的路上心情很不好，我小心翼翼把自己的生气的原因划分到善良的范围以内，所以最后我得出的结论是，也许并不是真的介意和讨厌，我只是嫉妒妳而且不想承认，因为我曾经也有过这样的热闹而现在我有的都不复存在了。这样我就好受了很多。就开始原谅妳，因为本来，妳就不是我的朋友。
生活是轮回这件事情，不真的发生在自己身上的时候都觉得是扯淡，今天我是真的这么觉得了，我中秋前日哭了两次中秋节哭了一整天，而现在我想，在下个结果出来之前我肯定都不会再有泪水了。那个时候就是这样，所有的烦恼都开始漂浮到表面，沉淀到心底的时候就只剩下轻轻的一点点。
而天气，也会一天比一天冷起来。
嗯
09月 14th, 2008 by eleph昨天晚上做了好长一个梦，想梦见不想梦见的人都梦见了。
我终于下了决心
09月 10th, 2008 by eleph 我今晚梦见菲丽丝回来，
她美丽得就像一道霞光，
她希望其幽灵还能作爱。
而我拥抱着一裸女，像伊克西翁[注]一样。
她的影子飘到我床上，浑身裸赤，
对我说：“亲爱的达蒙我回来了；
在那悲惨的日子，我更加美丽，
我离开后，命运就把我扣押。
“我来是为了再吻那最俊的情人；
我来是为了死在你的拥抱当中！”
当我的热情被这偶像滥用，
她便对我说：“再见，我去看望死神，
当他夸口说奸污了我的肉体，
你也可以夸口说奸污了我的灵魂。”
—- 《讽刺的巴那斯》
注：伊克西翁，希腊神话人物。他与亲戚反目后逃亡，后被宙斯收留，但他不久就勾引赫拉，结果被宙斯绑在地狱的火轮上。
《私密日记》是最容易读得下去的一本，填充零散时间苦中作乐。而《我心赤裸》中引用的这首十四行诗真是直击心扉亚。
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秋天是个扭捏的小姑娘，我真想拖她一把，然后高高兴兴地穿上新毛衣去上自习。
